The other day I was having coffee with an old friend. He has recently found a lovely lady and I was teasing him about how his days of drunken antics are behind him. Time to cuddle in for the winter.
The spotlight turned to me – what I wanted. I mentioned that for the first time in a long time it would be nice to spend some real time with someone. To feel all the feelings that stir inside when you really love a person. It’s a little scary in a wonderful, I-think-I’m-falling-off-a-cliff kind of way.
He offered me some advice. It was simple, yet it hit a nerve.
“You are doing your thing. The world is your oyster, you can have whatever you want…don’t settle.”
Just like that.
Like he didn’t even realise the power of his own words because they were just truth to him.
But it served as a reminder.
For me personally – love doesn’t have to be perfect. These days it definitely doesn’t have to look like the movies, or a fairytale. But it does have to be extraordinary. It has to shake me at the roots and fill my head with plans. It looks like sitting on the kitchen floor until 2am with a bottle of red wine and a game of scrabble. It looks like the freedom to be perfectly imperfect and know that you will be accepted all the same – possibly admired for your shadow. It looks like lying in bed having long conversations that you just couldn’t have with anyone else. It looks like patience, passion and safety – but not too safe. It looks like two people who refuse to disappear inside the other, but who stand behind one another at every crossroad life will offer. It is warm and kind and terrifying and strange and at times, a little painful.
But, if it isn’t extraordinary, root-shaking, plan-making love – it just isn’t worth it for me.
Dress – Witchery Shoes – Skin